from Prefatory Provisions
by Ida Börjel
1a § I’m the one in charge.
1b § Legis virtus haec est: imperare,
vetare, permittere, punire.
1c § The force of law is this: to
command, prohibit, permit, punish.
2a § The Consumer Purchases Act on the
whole is an imperative law.
3 § Such law apply to working hours.
In principle anyone can be salesman.
Regardless, the seller answer for the
law-binding obligations of a seller.
The seller one day will be held
accountable for himself. But the seller
won’t answer for anyone else and in other
words he isn’t in duty bound to state the
name or number of somebody. Neither he
is bound to hand over images, at least not
those of non-natural persons, that is, the
Net, the Spirit, the Television, etcetera.
No seller is allowed to empty his home
of each one of the company’s products, and
change into work suit and personal clothes,
respectively, in the garage.
A seller is a seller down to the
core of himself.
Sellers shall look forward to the refund.
The buyer: a natural real life person who
mainly makes purchases for those purposes
which slide against reality, from an, often,
incomprehendable hesitation. As an effect
of the purchasing, reality is made more
Purchasing is a manner of dropping anchor,
albeit the buyer believes to have attached
the lump of heart to a wing.
A purchase gives the buyer a receipt for
reality, and reality a receipt for the buyer.
A purchase is a matter of existence.
If required, the buyer can be traced off the
Buyers shall look forward to the paycheck.
The seller cannot negotiate with the
dead and not with embryos. Real life is
referring to foetuses by the eighteenth
week, people in coma, the brain dead, the
completely paralyzed and everybody normal.
They all live and may consume at will.
Pets are not accepted as buyers.
4a § The law also apply to the notion of
any product due to be produced, but as yet
not in production. The product instead
appears as an image in a brochure and in
the brain of the buyer. In the head of the
seller the reflection of a product
amounts to money. It is uncertain whether
the seller earlier saw his mother
where he now sees money. The image
however can never correspond to reality
completely. Images are presented by
means of two dimensions, whereas reality
The law is staged for each time it is being
Always compare the printed version with
The image may be real, but then as an
The law qualify as part of reality and shall
be compared with itself accordingly
4d § The buyer knows it is an illusion,
and that is what she sets her heart on, not
to make life more real, but to make it a bit
less real. The dream. The fabulous. Roses.
4e § The buyer isn’t out for truth, but for
The first passage doesn’t apply when the
4f § It is difficult for the seller to
know how the buyer reasons.
Divergent terms of agreement
5a § Those terms that give the buyer a
disadvantage, when not otherwise stated
in the law.
5b § Irregularities in the body structure
of buyer and seller. The dog's-eared,
the creased. The conviction of the
seller, the doubts of the buyer.
5c § Whisking the gaze away. Shifting of
refusal. Sellers leaving their checkout
counter when there is a line built up.
Sellers who buy their own products
although there is a buyer offering to buy
Sales promotion upselling
The buyer: If I give you
all of me?
The seller: And if there
are any leftovers?
I don' t know how much more
I can take, the buyer thinks.
I don' t know how much more
she can take, the seller thinks.
The seller: A brooch, a clasp,
Dura lex, sed lex
77 § It might be a tough law,
but nonetheless it is the law.
77 § Sell! Sell! Sell!
77 § Lex dura, sed lex.
A tough law, but a law.