St. Petersburg Hotel Series:
by Cathy Park Hong


3. The Fountain Outside the Arboretum


Ahoy! whitening wadder fountain. Drink. Afta cuppa-ful
of H20, yo pissin fang transfomate to puh'ly whites
lika Bollywood actress swole in saffron,
Flashim her tarta molar to her coquetry man.

Me drink gallon-a-day.( bares her teeth ) ssshhhee?
Issshh beautiful, eh? . frum purim H20 wit flouride y
sulfate y tu typical humectant lika xylitol
which supa-boosta Flouride's cavity fightim powa.

So go'on miff, you mus' drink. Me good-fo-nut'ing
fadder once salem to me, "Ttalim, you mus' habba de whitest
I-ppal so you catchim holistic hotshot man." Me fadder hed
rat-hole teef, y you have it too wid dim nicotine mold
on packiderm tusk .

Eberyone habba de bes' teeth! Shinier den
'Merikken Colgates..'Cos me molar, me attract lusty lubbas,
But I no likeum if dim have moss sweaters on dim teef
Even if dim wining dining me. As me fadder salem,
"You triumph only wit da whitest."




Other poems by Cathy Park Hong in ActionYes #1:
Language Guide
St. Petersburg Hotel Series:
1. Services
2. Preparation for Winter in the St. Petersburg Arboretum
Atop the St. Petersburg Dome